Wednesday, January 01, 2014

There is no other way...

I enjoy writing. I really do. But I don't write that often except for work. Let's face it... writing trouble tickets for a technical support help desk is not exactly high art or fulfilling. But it does often drain me of words. I have found it to be true that when I use a certain amount of words in a day it becomes hard to use more. My brain says "Okay, I quit. I'm going to go take a nap now."

Ever since I got married in August I have been using what is left of my words with my wife. I even have stopped logging in to Gtalk after work because as much as I love my Mom and Sister (Dad is not a huge IMer.) I need those words... I need to save them for my wife. I just cannot afford to spend those words with Mom and Sister because I need to spend them on my wife.

But I also love writing. And I wonder if God is calling me to write. I was recently on a honeymoon road trip and something about the road made me think of a book I read a number of years ago and I started telling my Lovely Wife about some of the concepts and ideas... and then I started telling her about some of *my* story ideas. One of which I would like to develop. How it has many possible stories that can be told. And how God can be shown in them.

Is God calling me to write? I dunno. I am not a great writer. I look at the writers I respect (David Weber, John Ringo, David Drake, Eric Flint, and others) and I see that I am not in their league. But I also know that the only way to improve is to do. I may never reach the skill they have. But that doesn't matter.

Wifey and I (and some family friends) were talking about some stuff in Hebrews, about how Christ learned Obedience through Suffering. From their we talked about how Obedience brought Joy and Strength from God. How it did not matter the circumstance, the results, your talent, or the pain. The *only* thing that matters when God calls us to do something is *Obedience.*

Trust, and obey. There is no other way than to just trust and obey.

I heard that how many times in my life, and now I understand it.
And it sucks.

But it is true. I either trust God, and will obey Him, having faith and hope that He will support me and my wife, or I don't.

Is God calling me to write?

I don't know. I just don't. But as an exercise of faith, I am going to try. Because if He is, I am being obedient. And He will support me in that. He will grow that desire. He will give me supernatural aid in character development, in structure, in plot. He will have scenes almost write themselves (I have experienced this before...). He will be my co-author.

If I am not called to write... then it will pass.

It is really just that simple.

So moving forward, I will work on the blog as I can. But I think most of my writing efforts will be going into a series of stories about Men (and Women) of Valor. How many, how long, how often... I really don't know. I need to do some world building (and destroying... mwahahahaha) first. Some character sketches. I thing I may need to work up some Character Sheets to pin up around my PC/writing desk. Maybe a map... I dunno.

This blog will be here. I may talk about my writing, the process, the struggles, etc. I may talk about my wonderful wife. I will almost certainly talk about being a 29 year old newlywed husband.
But above all... I will write. I will trust, and obey.